Walking away

You stretch your arms and legs and brace yourself, your half naked self, for an impact. Tonight's not any other. Instead of wounding your journal with haiku and what came to pass during the day, or marinate in the couch in front of the idiot box, you decide the temptation's too much and you go out.

And finally, the inner peace you affectionately name serenity leads you by the pool. The pool, specialists say, is a haven for children with autism, after all one characteristic of such is having the propensity to play in the water. You were once afraid of the pool after a near-death incident you had two years back.

Then you stare at the pool as if staring at an old enemy. Then you take a leap and eventually you come out fine. If anything, you are reminded of the first time you drove a car. You held tight to the wheel, ten and two position as your dad told you, stepped onto the accelerator, you thought you were going to mess it up like you messed up so many events in your life. Then you were fine to the point where your dad handed you the key and let you drive the car for another mile, and another mile and you drove for hours on end.

A few more lapses and the indelible smell of chlorine finally make you decide to emerge from the water. You look around the area. People, mostly scantily clad girls, girls not even ladies, huddle around the corner. Some dive in, others seemingly trying to get your attention, others smoke like there's no tomorrow. Like any hot-blooded male you rest your eyes on them.

But you're a man, and manhood entails you to stand up above your natural male tendencies. Real masculinity, as you have learned, is having a character of a warrior-poet, after all, as men we are called to lead and serve and offer the women our strength, not draw our strength from them. You're doing a them a great disservice and you deceive yourself when give in to lust.

You decide to get out and walk away. You conclude that the city holds a lot of temptation. Then you guard you heart. Then you walk away. You walk away.